Special Tee Talk

blanktIs this Your tee shirt?

I had to ask. In the above picture, is that your tee or T-shirt? What can be said about it: white, bright, blank, bland, boring, blah. It doesn’t have to be. Imagine words of your choosing on it –for yourself and other people to read, contemplate, and remember. Your shirt could make a statement demonstrating humor, wisdom, sarcasm, philosophy. Whatever you wish. Want to know more? Below, I’ve listed a few of the pithy sayings I found on shirts in a few of the 50+ catalogs I received this past Christmas season. Check them out. Hopefully, a few will cause you to smile.

My dog walks me every day.

Sorry I’m late but I don’t want to be here.

Exercise? I thought you said “extra fries.”

Think like a proton: Stay positive.

Don’t grow up. It’s a trap.

Listen. I’m a nice person. So if I’m mean to you, you need to ask yourself why.

I’d grow my own food if I could only find bacon seeds.

My cat can sleep longer than your cat.

I may be left handed, but I’m always right.

You are about to exceed the limits of my medication.

Tomorrow: A mythical land where I get all my stuff done.

Aunt: like a Mom only cooler.

I’m not a proctologist …but I know an #??hole when I see one. (Sorry; I had to include this one. It’s so good.)

A little gray hair is a small price to pay for all this wisdom.

Never laugh at your wife’s/husband’s choices. You were one of them.

Wine is to Women, as duct tape is to Men. It fixes everything.

I am NOT a control freak, but…can I show you the RIGHT way to do that?

English is weird. It can be understood through tough, thorough thought though.

Always give 100% …unless you’re donating blood.

What’s another word for Synonym?

My password is the last 8 digits of Pi.

Pilots: looking down at people since 1903.

I’m going to stop asking: How dumb can you get? People seem to be taking it as a challenge.

I’m trying to be Independent. But no one will help me.

Never trust an ATOM. They make up everything.

I will wear black until they make a darker color.

At my age, I’m more apt to forget than to forgive.

Top Ten Reasons to Procrastinate: 1)

I put the PRO in PROcrastinate.

I would lose weight but I don’t like losing.

Read books NOT T-shirts.

When would be a good time to buy or receive “a talking T?” Christmas? Birthday? Father’s or Mother’s day? National Peanut Week? Take Your Dog to Work Day?

What statements would you like to make? Do you have a special one of your own in mind? Next Christmas, what will your NEW shirt say? There is just one guideline: Make sure your words suit you to a T. (Did you see that coming? Of course you did.)


About rcarmean

Two things... First, why have I decided to establish this blog? I like to put essays together. I research an idea or topic looking for information, statistics, stories, quotes, pictures, etc. I enjoy the process and seeing a finished product. I’m told that as I get older, new activities can help maintain energy and keep my brain alert. In other words, I am not doing this for money or fame. Second, regarding the gentleman in the collage of pictures above...it's not me. Those are photos of Christy Mathewson. Why him? When I was young, my primary activity was being sick. It took up much of my time. Eczema (a case so bad I was written up in a medical journal showing doctors what their patients COULD look like), asthma, and allergies. You know allergies: don’t eat this, don’t wear that, and, for Heaven’s sake, don’t touch any of these things (eg, dogs, cats, horses --I only saw horses in cowboy movies and TV shows, dust, swimming pools, my brother --OK, that’s an exaggeration, Rick was a fine brother). In my spare time between doctors' appointments, pills, and ointments, baseball kept me sane. In the 1940s and 1950s, when I grew up, pro footballI and basketball had not yet become extremely popular. Baseball truly was “the national pastime.” I listened to games on the radio (remember it? TV without the picture). I read magazines, books, and newspaper accounts of games. I collected baseball cards. I learned about the game’s history, as well as present. The same with its stars. One man stood out: Christy Mathewson. He was a great pitcher for the New York Giants in the early 20th century. But there was much more to him. At a time when professional athletes made little money (yes, there was such a time) and ball players were considered on the same level as actors, artists, and prostitutes, Mathewson stood out. One of his nicknames was: “The Christian Gentleman.” Most men is baseball drank, smoked, cursed, and fought —with other players, umpires, and fans. The fights were physical, not just verbal. Mathewson did none of these things. But he earned the respect of other players who did them all. Even Ty Cobb and John McGraw. There’s more. He was a college graduate (Bucknell University) when most men were lucky to have a high school diploma. He played other sports, including pro football which you wouldn’t recognize. He was handsome. He played in New York City, then as now, the largest city in the country. Excellence and popularity there meant fame and money. He dressed well. Today, his commercials would rival LeBron’s. And, finally, a hero’s life must have tragedy. After his playing career ended, WWI arrived. He suffered from influenza and was exposed to mustard gas. Chemical warfare. His lungs were damaged and he required treatment for the rest of his life. (Like my Grandfather who also fought in The Great War.) He died in 1925. He was 45 years old. I have his picture here because you need to know more about him than me. He was what an athlete could be. Players like him and their accomplishments got me through a sickly, painful childhood and can still sustain me in difficult times. *****
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